He kept running, each stride just beyond my reach.
"Come on," he laughed. I chased after him.
"Slow down," I said, trying to catch my breath.
Bam.
The force of my weight crashed into him. He stopped abruptly, standing rigid in front of the gate.
It was then I heard his heavy breathing. My face, still pressed against his sweater, caught the scent of lavender detergent.
Between breaths, he finally whispered, "I can't stay."
I looked up and saw the energy radiating from the gate—an invisible force emitting sparks and heat.
"What's on the other side?" I asked, though I already knew.
"My world," he confirmed.
"I'm not allowed to enter?"
"I don’t think you’d survive in my world."
"Why?"
"Because there’s another you."
"Have you met her?"
He hesitated, then murmured, "The other you?"
"Yes."
He hesitated again.
"No."
"Do you think she’ll be like me?"
"I don’t think so."
"I guess she’s just another me in another parallel universe..." I said quietly to myself. She’s just another me. A woman with the same looks, the same hair, the same voice—but ultimately not me.
And she can’t be me.
"She’s not you," he echoed my thoughts. "That, I’m sure of."
"What if there’s another you here?"
I felt him place his hand over mine. That’s when I realized I’d never let go of him. My arms were still wrapped around his waist, my body lightly brushing against his. Instinctively, I didn’t want to let go.
I didn’t want to let him go. Because if I did, what would all of this mean? All of these memories of him. All the moments of my heart racing and butterflies in my stomach. All the longing and nights spent hoping for a tomorrow with us in it. Would these things be gone? Lost among the gaps and rifts of multiple universes, becoming nothing more than fragments of thought no one would remember?
My memories of him... reduced to nothing but a speck of dust. A speck of starlight dimming in a distant universe.
"There probably is..." he finally said, turning his head to the side, his voice quiet.
"And he won’t be you..."
He can’t travel between universes like you. He can’t leap from one timeline to another, safeguarding worlds and restoring balance. He’d just be another young man, walking the path of an ordinary life. Maybe he’d carry a backpack, running in new sneakers to catch the last bus. Maybe he’d spend his afternoons in a café, working on a report due tomorrow. He could laugh with friends. He could hold a bouquet of roses, waiting at someone’s doorstep.
But he would never be Jikan.
He would never be the man who pulled me back from the intersection, saving my life when I was pushed into oncoming traffic. He would never be the man who looked me in the eyes and said, "It’s not your time."
He grounded me, ending my days of emptiness. He gave me reasons to move forward.
He told me about the gates to other universes. He spoke of the different lives people lived in alternate worlds—lives that were similar yet entirely different.
"The things you’ve lost, or the love that was unrequited... perhaps in another universe, things turned out differently," he once said, smiling. "Sometimes, I like to think my parents are still safe and sound in another universe. That’s all I really need to know—that the happy ending you desperately wished for might be real somewhere else."
I asked him why he had to travel between universes. He told me it was his destiny. One day, he woke up and was told he was meant to be a guardian. To travel between universes and fix any imbalances.
"Sometimes things don’t go as planned," he explained. "Items get lost, trapped in the wrong universe. Someone has to fix it."
"What do you do after it’s fixed?"
"I go back to my normal life... until something else goes wrong."
"What happens if things aren’t fixed?"
"There’s a chain reaction. It’s like spilling your coffee in the morning. Next thing you know, you miss your ride, fail an important interview, and end up moving to a different city. You never meet the love of your life or have the family you were meant to have. And you wonder if there was something you didn’t know about, something you’ve been missing all along."
"But if you never knew you were supposed to have this other life... how would you miss it?"
He didn’t answer. But he placed his hand over his chest. I guess you’d feel it... if it was truly important.
On the day Jikan saved me, he told me I wasn’t supposed to die. That I had more important things to live for. He said he had to save me—for the balance of the universes.
He didn’t elaborate further.
As my arms stayed wrapped around him, he gently squeezed my hands.
"Before I go, I want to tell you something," he said softly.
"What?"
He let go of my hands this time. I watched as he turned away, taking a step back and creating a gap between us. He was only inches from the gate, closer to his world than to me.
"I lied," he said. "There was a woman in my universe. Her name was Nala. She was the love of my life. But I lost her..." His eyes dimmed, the light within them fading as if a part of him was gone forever.
When he spoke again, his voice was soft, almost inaudible. "Then one day, I saw a glimpse of her in this universe. It was the day you looked so lost, so hopeless, crossing that intersection. Someone accidentally pushed you, and you were almost hit by a truck. Without thinking, I reached out... knowing I shouldn’t have. But I saw a glimpse of her. I saw a glimpse of you.
"Without thinking, I held onto the last chance to touch her... just one last time. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you a long time ago, but I didn’t know where to begin. I wasn’t supposed to alter your fate. But I did... and for that, I can’t forgive myself.
"I did it out of selfishness. I did it out of greed. I should’ve been punished for it—and I was. I can no longer travel between universes. That’s why I have to go today. This is the last time I’ll be here with you, in this universe.
"I’m so sorry—and so thankful for all the moments I’ve had with you. You were the light in the darkest hours of my life. Thank you... and I’m so sorry."
His voice broke, and tears streamed down his cheeks.
My heart went cold and still. Perhaps I couldn’t comprehend the truth he had just told me. Perhaps I didn’t have the strength to face it.
I didn’t know what to say, so I nodded.
I watched as he whispered “sorry” over and over, then stepped backward. The current surged toward him, creating instant sparks and flashes of electricity.
I watched him disappear into nothingness.
I watched as the face I had come to love, the face I thought I couldn’t live without, dissolved into thin air.
And just like that, everything vanished. The gate, the current, the entrance to another world, another life. The man who carried a piece of me—it all disappeared.
**
Six years later
I never saw another gate to another universe after Jikan left. Life returned to normal. The little things were just... little things. The excitement and zest for life eventually faded as the days blurred together.
But on that particular Monday morning, I saw him.
Among the crowd and the passing traffic, I saw him standing across the intersection.
It was the same face I had known. I recognized his dark hair, though I didn’t recognize the white jacket.
When the light turned green, I watched as he crossed the street, each step like the ticking of a clock. I moved forward too.
As we passed one another, I felt nothing. No rush of currents. No sparks. He wasn’t Jikan. He was just another version of him, another man in this universe. A passerby. He could be someone’s brother, someone’s friend, someone’s lover—or just a stranger.
When I reached the other side, I turned back. He was walking away, his figure receding into the crowd.
He wasn’t Jikan.
But I wasn’t Nala either.
So who was he?
I started jogging, then running. I crossed back to the other side of the intersection.
I ran.
When I caught up to him, I reached out and touched his shoulder.
He turned around, pulling out his earbuds, confused.
"Huh?"
"What’s your name?" I asked, still catching my breath.
"... Senzhu."
"Ainna," I said. "I’m Ainna."
And it's nice to meet you, Senzhu.